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Are You the Red Flag?

Posted on March 24, 2024 by Olivia Q, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.

Here's why you were not the red flag in toxic relationships and the pain was not your fault.

To the incredible women who’ve navigated toxic relationships,
There’s a question that often cross your mind long after we’ve left a toxic relationship: “Was I the red flag?” It’s a haunting thought that can cast doubts on our self-worth and leave us questioning our actions.

Let’s clear this up: No, you were not the red flag.

Toxic relationships often leave us tangled in a web of confusion. Manipulation, gaslighting, and emotional abuse can distort our perception of reality. We may start to believe that our actions or emotions were the cause of the chaos. But here’s the truth: healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, communication, and understanding. They don’t leave you constantly questioning your worth.

So, why do we sometimes feel like we were the problem?

It’s a common effect of toxic dynamics. When we’re constantly told something is wrong with us, we start believing it. But here’s the reality check: you were in a relationship that didn’t honor your value, your boundaries, or your emotional well-being.

You are not a red flag for wanting respect.
You are not a red flag for setting boundaries.
You are not a red flag for seeking love and care.

Recognizing the signs of toxicity is a testament to your strength. Walking away from a toxic relationship takes courage and resilience. It’s a step toward reclaiming your power and prioritizing your own happiness with Self- Love.

Remember, healing isn’t about blaming yourself; it’s about understanding, learning, and growing. It’s about recognizing your worth and refusing to settle for anything less than the love and respect you deserve.
With love,
Olivia

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