Why We Fall Back Into Old Patterns and How to Break Them
Posted on September 23, 2025 by Jessica Manca, One of Thousands of Career Coaches on Noomii.
Why we slip back into old habits under stress, and how coaching helps you stay consistent and make change last.
A client recently asked me:
“Why did I forget? Why did I lose the tools that had been helping me when stress hit?”
This is common. He had been setting aside time for strategy, focusing on leadership, and working on the bigger picture. Then stress came. Almost immediately, he slid back into the old default with no self-management, no accountability, back in the weeds.
It happens to everyone. Under stress, we return to what feels comfortable, even when it doesn’t serve us.
The Real Work of Change
Real change isn’t about starting a habit. It’s about keeping that habit when life gets hard. That’s when the old patterns show up again.
This is where coaching helps. Together, we notice the slip, replace the old behavior, and keep building until the new way becomes the default.
Change Is a Process
When I completed my graduate program for executive coaching in 2013, I studied a model called the Stages of Change. It’s a framework that explains why making change stick takes time.
The stages move from awareness to intention, to action, to maintenance. But there’s also a natural part of the process called relapse — a return to old behaviors.
This isn’t failure. It’s expected. Each time you cycle through, you learn, and the spiral moves upward. With awareness, you get stronger and the change lasts.
What It Means for You
Think about one change you want to make right now.
Where are you in this cycle?
Are you building momentum, maintaining progress, or finding yourself back in old habits?
Knowing where you are helps you stay focused, especially when stress pushes you toward your default.
Final Thought
Personal change is not a quick fix. It’s a process that requires awareness, consistency, and support. Coaching gives you the structure and accountability to stay with it until the new way becomes second nature.
If you’re ready to stop slipping back into old patterns and make your change last, I’d love to help.
Let’s talk about how coaching can support you.
