Assertive Behaviors

Posted on September 26, 2012 by Galina Bannova, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.

ASSERTIVE BEHAVIOR

 Speaking up and asking questions at a meeting
 Commenting about being interrupted by a male directly to him at the moment he interrupts you
 Stating your views to a male authority figure
 Attempting to offer solutions and elaborating on them when there are men present
 Your body
 Entering and exiting a room where men are present
 Speaking in front of a group
 Maintaining eye contact, keeping your head upright, and leaning forward when in a personal conversation
Your mind
 Going out with a group of friends when you are the only one without a “date”
 Being especially competent, using your authority and/or power without labeling yourself as “ bitchy, impolite, bossy, or aggressive”
 Requesting expected service when you haven’t received it
Apology
 Being expected to apologize for something and not apologizing since you feel you are right
 Requesting the return of borrowed items without being apologetic
Compliments, Criticism, and Rejection
 Receiving a compliment by saying something assertive to acknowledge that you are agree with the person complimenting you
 Accepting a rejection
 Not getting the approval of the most significant male in your life and/or of any male
 Discussing another person’s criticism of you openly with that person
 Telling someone that she/he is doing something that is bothering you
Saying “NO”
 Refusing to get coffee or to take notes at a meeting where you are chosen to do so because you are female
 Saying “no” – refusing to a favor when you are really don’t feel like it
 Turning down a request for a meeting or date
Manipulation and Counter Manipulation
 Telling a person when you think she/he is manipulating you
 Commenting to a male who has made a patronizing remark to you
Sensuality
 Telling a prospective lover about your physical attraction to him/her before any such statements are made to you
 Initiating sex with your partner
 Showing physical enjoyment of an art show or concert in spite of other’s reactions
 Asking to be caressed and /or telling your lover what feels good to you
Anger
 Expressing anger directly and honestly when you feel angry
 Arguing with another person
Humor
 Telling a joke
 Listening to a friend tell a story about something embarrassing, but funny, that you have done
 Responding with humor to someone’s put-down of you
Children
 Disciplining your own children
 Disciplining others’ children
 Explaining the fact of life or your divorce to your child
Women Together
 Talking about your feelings of competition with another woman whom you feel competitive