Dying to be Free: How Illness Can Be a Catalyst for a Wonderful Life
Posted on July 10, 2014 by Stephanie Payne, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
Often disease visits our bodies when we are not living authentically or suppressing a part of ourselves.
Cancer! A big word that loomed over me for many months. It first came in the form of an elevated white blood cell count, which can be an indication of disease in the body. Disease was another big word that attached itself to my fit, vegetarian, never had a major disease self. The lack of ease had unveiled itself, crept out from the inner closet I tried to stuff it in and became a part of me that I could no longer ignore. I had my blood tested every month and was eventually sent to an oncologist. While the doctors were unable to identify the cause of my strange blood cell count, I knew in my heart why I lacked ease.
The ease one feels when they are authentically themselves, the ease that comes when we peel away the mask, shed the armor and become our most vulnerable, flawed, and beautiful selves was a state of being that I could not step into. Often disease visits our bodies when we are not living authentically or suppressing a part of ourselves.
Are you in a job just for the money? Do you want to start your own business, be more creative, move to a new area but you let fear keep you for even starting. Do you hide your true nature in intimate relationships?
Examining your core belief systems can help you to understand why disease visits your body, but more importantly it can inform you how to move forward. Journaling and guided meditation have helped my clients uncover deeply-held desires that they have suppressed from childhood. When my clients let those desires come to the surface, they then begin to examine the belief systems that keep them from attaining those desires. This process not only brings about discoveries that give clients a springboard toward their dreams, I often see remarkable and quick healing in their bodies as well. I have personally experienced this type of healing.
As an adult child of an alcoholic, I did not feel worthy unless I was doing something for someone or achieving something valuable. But my lack of ease literally caused my body to begin to shut down. The cancer closed in when I was diagnosed with a lump in my left breast. A biopsy was ordered. When the female oncologist, a woman I could see myself befriending in a different setting, sat me down 24 hours before I was to have the procedure, I knew I had to make a change. I decided to end a marriage that was filled with hurt and pain, and quell the urge to “do” and just “be.” I believe that quietly made decision saved my life. The lump was benign and my blood count returned to normal levels.
What I now know is that unless we honor all aspects of who we are, we inform our bodies on a cellular level of a sense of unworthiness. Acknowledging all aspects of our humanity, even the parts that don’t jive with our upbringing gives us the freedom to live with ease.
