Mean What You Say
Posted on May 11, 2015 by Reginald Jackson Sr, One of Thousands of Executive Coaches on Noomii.
Sometimes we say things we don't mean...why? This article takes a close look at verbal communication and how it affects the people around us.
We’re all familiar with the nursery rhyme, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”…not true! The words we use can be hurtful, confusing, misleading, etc. Verbal communication is often times a byproduct of incomplete thoughts. At some point or another, we have made the sorrowful statement, “That’s not what I meant”. This presents the question; what was really meant? More importantly, what was the intent of your words? What message did you want to convey? It’s important we take responsibility for the words we use because they can be misunderstood or misinterpreted in many ways. Speaking with intent is a skill many do not practice. Although mastery of communication is certainly a subject left (literally) up to interpretation, one thing is clear; the words we use have an effect on those who hear them!
While this article is not meant to be a comprehensive discussion on communication, it does stress the importance of clear communication so your message is received the way you intended. There’s no real mystery to verbal communication, however it is an art. Not one to fear or avoid, but one that should bring about excitement. You actually get to share your thoughts with others!
There are three basic elements to consider in verbal communication:
Your audience
Your message
Your intent
When addressing your audience, make sure you use a common language. People are less impressed with your verbosity, and more interested in understanding the words coming out of your mouth! Nothing will create eyes rolling and silent sighs of agony more than oral flatulence and pontification. People aren’t interested in how many big words there are in your vocabulary, how much jargon you know, or how many acronyms you have at your disposal. What’s most important is a meaningful message.
In most cases, the first two elements are usually a foregone conclusion. Typically, you consider your audience and your message! However, most important of all is the intent; why is your conversation important? Chances are, the idea of intent is rarely considered. Making that a priority before speaking will certainly increase the effectiveness of your message. What purpose does it serve? Being able to answer this question makes all the difference in the world. So before initiating a conversation, or before making a response, ask yourself those questions. You may be surprised at what you find!
