How do you handle conflict among team members?

Posted on August 31, 2016 by Monika Jensen, One of Thousands of Executive Coaches on Noomii.

The old saying goes, “When life hands you a lemon, try making lemonade.” The idea is to turn a problem into an advantage by dealing with it directly and creativity. Conflicts present us with similar opportunities for creativity. What is more, they come with greater resources: two heads can be better than one – if both minds are directed toward solving a mutual problem rather than toward defeating one another, ignoring the problem, avoiding it, or settling for a less than satisfactory outcome.
So how do you handle conflict among team members?
 Ask those who disagree to paraphrase one another’s comments. This may help them learn if they really understand one another
 Work out a settlement. Agree on the underlying source of conflict, then engage in give and take and finally agree on a solution.
 Ask each member to list what the other side should do. Exchange lists, select concessions all are willing to accept, and test the settlement to see if it fits with the team goals.
 Have the sides each write 5 questions for their opponents. This will allow them to signal their major concerns about the other side’s position. And the answers may lead to an agreed upon solution.
 Convince employees they sometimes may have to admit they are wrong. Help them save face by convincing them that changing a position may well show strength.
 Respect the experts on the team. Give their opinions more weight when the conflict involves their expertise, but do not rule out conflicting opinions.
If your workplace has personal harassment and workplace conflict and you are not sure what to do, you may just need to talk about it. Experience shows there are many ways managers can improve internal communication. Here are some things they should do:
 Understand that communication is a two-way street. It involves giving information and getting feedback from employees. It is not finished when information is given.
 Put more emphasis on face-to-face communication with employees. Do not rely mainly on bulletin boards, memos and other written communication.
 Ask themselves, each time they give an instruction, if the message is clear. Most vagueness is caused by failing to be specific. Example: Do not just tell an employee to “show more interest” in his or her work. If an employee spends too much time chatting with others, be specific about it.
 View information as “service to” employees and not “power over” them.
 Listen to employees; show respect for them when they speak. They will feel part of the team and will tend to be more dedicated and productive. One way: Ask questions to show interest and clarify points.
 Do not just talk open door policy. Practice it by walking around and talking to employees. Allow people to disagree and to come up with new ideas.
 Conduct one-on-one meetings. Ask each employee to tell the manager how the manager can help the employee to do a better job. Then share those things employees can do to help the manager do a better job.
 Prepare publications frequently. Emphasize current issues that employees care about; do not substitute quarterly “prettier” publications for substantive, up-to-date ones.
 Concentrate on building credibility with employees. Managers who lack credibility and fail to create a climate of trust and openness are not believed-no matter how hard they try to communicate.