The Emotional Element
Posted on March 09, 2011 by Tanya Shropshire, One of Thousands of Family Coaches on Noomii.
Helping teenagers and young adults with their emotional problems.
These words of wisdon really helps teenagers and young adults deal with some of the emotional baggage they are faced with.
Why am I so emotional?
If you find yourself in an uncomfortable emotional space it’s usually because your values and your lifestyle aren’t aligning as they should be. When these out of place emotions correlate to relationships you may feel the need for change, adjustment, transformation, closure, or insight.
Emotional Victim
When people join the lifestyle of quiet desperation, they tend to experience a lack of meaning, hopelessness and impotence in their work/school roles. They often think of themselves as the “poor victim”. A victim is a person who suffers a loss because of the actions of others.
Do people really care about my emotions?
Generally when we are faced with problems causing us to feel overwhelmed by our emotions we rarely see our involvement in the solution. We cannot easily recognize that we play an active role in the system that’s causing the problem.
How others effect your emotions
We possess the capacity to assess all decisions that come to us. When we rely too much on information from a number of our peers and family we become confused and emotionally beat. Search for truth behind anything that introduces emotional confusion. Move away from that which is emotionally unbeneficial and grow close to those things which bring you emotional stability.
Being a emotional wreak
Allow feelings of discomfort to give you the strength needed for personal growth. I grew up never hearing the words. “I love you”, from my Mom. Then one day when I was 21 I realized this was having a profound effect on my emotional well being. I decided to pray upon these feelings and found the courage I needed to drive to my Mom’s house and let my Mom know how I felt. We chatted for a few minutes while she worked in the yard and before I left my newfound courage allowed me to tell her, “I love you.” This gave me the emotional peace I had been missing.
Being emotionless
Emotional energy is neither created nor destroyed. It is our choice to feel strong and empowered or weak and powerless. It is important that we choose emotionally healthy environments rather than cutting ourselves off from emotions completely and separate ourselves from this important life tool.
Can you emotional handle a relationship and work emotionally?
It is important to surround ourselves with people who are just as motivated and emotionally healthy as we wish to be. Not allowing our negative emotions and drama to effect others will attract people who are healthy emotionally. For example if a relationship is preventing you from staying focused on your work, then take some time away from this person and place yourself in an environment where you are surrounded by focused, motivated individuals. This will allow you to experience the feeling of working in a positive environment and you can then decided if this relationship is healthy.
How to make a relationship work when you have strong emotions
When you learn how to love unconditionally, you have the ability to pick and choose your battles. Find your values and let them manage your emotions. You don’t have to participate in conflict; instead you can project unconditional love and allow the other person to vent without taking it personally. This leaves you in an emotionally healthy place, and allows the other to experience only their emotions.
How to focus on your goals and deal with day to day emotions
Create a daily regiment for yourself. Incorporate healthy outlets to shape your the spiritual, mental, emotional, physical/academic aspects of your life. Become preoccupied with the big picture in your life (victory, contentment, triumph).
Building your emotional strength
Step 1: Confront your emotional luggage.
Step 2: Be prepared to “not” get the answers you’re looking for. The reason for confronting is you give yourself strength and a sense of control over your emotions.
Step 3: Seek truth and understanding in every weak point in your life.
