Overloaded? It's Not Your Dishwasher
Posted on December 19, 2018 by Andrea Paquette, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
Do you find yourself thinking - Here’s one more problem, chore, illness or discomfort I have to deal with as a woman, mom, wife, employee or boss?
Somehow more things keep getting added to your plate when you are already overloaded. You can do this to a dishwasher but not a human being. Yes, we woman are superhuman, no doubt, but even we have our breaking point.
These feelings of overload and overwhelm are common for women between 30 and 50 years old. The time after bearing children and before menopause is probably the most stressful time in a woman’s life. Trying to raise children, keep up with running a household, managing a family, balancing budgets and the demands of your career just seems to be too much.
Guess what? It is too much. It’s not humanly possible to do all these things well every day, all the time. And isn’t that what we expect of ourselves? We feel responsible for keeping everything and everyone afloat.
I remember being quite ill in the gynecologist office in the middle of the day and unable to leave. I had two children that needed to be picked up from school and several other things looming that could only be done by me. I called my husband to pick up the kids and I thought “OK the rest of the world is going to have to go on without me for a few hours.” I was truly worried that might not be possible.
This is your life created by you for your enjoyment. You really don’t have to bring food every time you go somewhere or shuttle around your neighbor’s kids. People will find someone else. You don’t have to be the answer to everyone’s problems.
Offload some tasks or obligations where the energy expended is greater than the feeling of satisfaction. If you can’t see some benefit or feel some enjoyment, it’s got to go!
Find Your Balance:
1. Practice saying no. “No thank you.” “Not today, some other time.” “I’ve got to go.” “I’m busy.” “That’s not my thing.” “No.”
2. Delegate the tasks you don’t like and then forget it! It doesn’t matter how it gets done. Remember, you are the head of the household.
3. Be honest with yourself and others about how you are feeling. “I’m not feeling great today.” “I’ve got to get some sleep.” “I need to be alone for a bit.”
4. Ask for help. Have a family meeting. Mom’s needs are important too.
