Mean what you say and say what you mean – without being mean!
Posted on February 22, 2020 by Polly Wain, One of Thousands of Executive Coaches on Noomii.
Through the coaching process, I can help you discover more of who you are most essentially, be true to yourself, speak up and keep your word.
It can be a brave thing, to give your word and to keep it, to care and say you care, and to speak with conviction. When you live up to what you say, you are making choices and decisions based on what you believe is right – and when you do this, you are more content with your decisions.
Meaning what you say and saying what you mean is about discovering more about yourself, what matters to you and bringing this into how you connect and relate to others. It’s about being authentic, having integrity and being credible, which comes form trustworthiness, through doing what you’ll say you’ll do – or ‘walking the talk’.
When we do speak from the heart and are considerate about who’s receiving the message, we’re bringing kindness into the equation – situational awareness. Or as the Dalai Lama put it: “Be kind whenever possible – it is always possible.”
At home and at work, there are times when you might be afraid to say what you really think, and times when social or cultural conventions prevent you from speaking up. In the workplace, the challenge is often cultural – authentic leadership can flourish if diversity is genuinely valued and diverse opinions and perspectives are desired, respected and heard. There are times when we simply don’t feel like it or feel it’s not worth it, and times we might feel it’s positively dangerous to speak up. This might not have stopped Malala Yousafzai or Martin Luther King, but we judge what’s right for us – and for the audience, and for those who rely on us – in any given situation. If you’d like me to hold space for you to explore, or use me as a sounding board, let me know.
We all have different perspectives on what it means to speak out and to speak from the heart – and there are many reasons why some of us find this difficult: we may have been told to be ‘seen and not heard’ as a child, or we might not like conflict, or come from a culture where being polite is more important than being honest and you’re working or living in a different culture now. These are mindsets you can reframe, if you choose.
I can help you explore and understand more about yourself and how you connect and relate to others. Without effective conversations, things get left unsaid and issues can go unresolved – personally and professionally. This is a major blocker to engagement, productivity and performance. It takes courage and commitment – and the results are worth it. Let me know how I can help, get in touch.
