A Reality Check for Married Couples in Stress or Distress
Posted on July 03, 2016 by Jeeva and Sulojana Sam, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.
Before calling it quits, married couples would be wise to take this reality check to decide if it's worth it or not.
Sometimes couples in marriage stress or distress need a reality check before they consider calling it quits.
One way that Marriage Mentors Sulojana Sam and I administer one is in a conversation that goes something like this:
“So, how long have you two been married now?”
“10 years.”
“How old are you now?”
“I’m 37. She’s 36.”
“Let’s say realistically that your age expectancy is 75 and hers is 79.”
“What does that have anything to do with us calling it quits now?”
“Bear with me for just one minute, Romeo/Juliet. Realistically, you could both be alive together for at least 38 more years.”
“Unless we kill each other before that.” (nervous laughter).
“That’s not funny.” (serious wink)
“Let’s say it takes you two a whole year, make it two full years to get your marriage back on track, you’ll still have at least 35 years to enjoy a happy, harmonious, fulfilling marriage.”
“(Bewildered look)”
“You have a choice now. Call it quits before making any attempt at restoring your marriage. Go through the stress and expense of divorce. Get ready to fork out alimony and child support payments for years to come…
OR
Put up with the pain of working through your issues, even if it takes two long years, then enjoy 35 plus years of marriage bliss."
“(Grunt)” or “Never thought of it that way before.” or “(Shake head)”
Sometimes they get it and start the journey to restoration. Joy! Sometimes one gets it, the other doesn’t. So sad :-(
No matter what their choice may be…they got a reality check.
If we can help administer a personalized reality check to you or someone else you know, book a free consultation at: www.meetme.so/JeevaSam
